yet another work related rant…

…only this one is about the problem with work related rants

mostly because I’m tired of having a job where I become the job, the job has no way of becoming me. This type of job ends up encompassing your entire life, where your entire life has to revolve around this job, which really really really sucks. Really. A lot of it has to do with what I bitched about last time, in that you don’t get to see family and friends that work real jobs because they’re all at home when you’re working and vice versa.

And then I just end up bitching about that job, complaining about it pretty much all the time. It shouldn’t be like this. No job is worth it. Mostly I just want to be content with what I’m doing. Not even happy, necessarily, just content. And a lot of that contentedness would come if I could work the hours the rest of the world works. I’d get to see my family. I’d get to talk to friends (not that I really have many, but still..). I’d get to do things in a normal time frame.

Supposedly, I work a skilled trade. But I don’t get treated like a tradesperson in my employers eyes, or in the eyes of the rest of the trade community, I’m sure. Nor do I get paid like the rest of the trade community, but that’s neither here nor there.

Anyways, that’s all I have to say for now.

/rant

PS oh yeah, and LBP is out next week! woohoo!

Holidays don’t exist, apparently.

So I’m kind of getting really sick of call centers. Really sick. They all seem to be under the impression that everyone who works there, unless you’ve been there since the damn place opened, was no family, no friends, and no life outside of work. Jenny and I BOTH have to work on thanksgiving. Over the years usually at least one of us has had it off, and it’s been years since we both did. At least if one of us has the day off we can go to her grandma’s house for thanksgiving and bring a plate back for the other in the very least. this year, as I said, we’re both working it, so thanksgiving doesn’t even exist to us.

Christmas has lost a lot of meaning to me since the first time I had to work on Christmas day. I don’t see why the hell getting some redneck’s internet working so he can jack off to midgets vomiting into each other’s mouths should take priority to seeing family (which, quite honestly, I don’t get to see enough of). It just seems ridiculous that any business should have its employees working on Christmas day. And as far as thanksgiving is concerned, there’s pretty much one canadian center handling this contract. have the fucking americans and phillipinos deal with it for one fucking day. let us see our families. I’ll never ever ever get enough seniority to be able to have any holidays off.

And on top of all this, my schedule is set up so that on Sundays, I have to start working at 12:30. This seems good in theory, because it means I’m off work at 9 and can take a bus home. In theory. In theory, communism works too. However, Sunday is the only day my mom and dad are ever in the city, and guess what? they can never be to my house before 12:30 because they come into the city to go to church. So now not only can I not see my family on holidays, I can’t even see them for the rest of the year either.

Fuck this shit. I need a new job.

/rant

I’m told I don’t update…

yeah yeah so I haven’t been posting as often as I was… sue me

there hasn’t really  been anything interesting going on in my life, just go to work, come home, sleep, get up, do it all again… not that that’s a bad thing, it’s stable, and there’s no drama, which is just how I likes it

So I’m looking into getting a laptop… yet another notch in my gadget belt, which is super exciting, I love having shiny new toys to play with lol… I blame my parents, i’ve had gadgets and video games and computers around me my entire life, so it’s not like I don’t know where my love of electronics from

So I had the opportunity to test drive a new Sony-Ericsson phone that isn’t out on the market yet. the F305. I know that places like gizmodo and other tech blogs have had impressions and previews kicking around for a few months, but I actually had the chance to take this phone out in the world for myself (which makes me feel special because no one else has it yet). It’s not a bad phone. I have a few issues though. First off, the storage. It’ll only recognize a maximum of 4GB M2 memory stick. Sony makes these. they make them a lot bigger than that too. And the fact that another S-E phone, the w580i, which is an older phone, can support an 8GB memory card, it seems unacceptable for any newer models to not support it. the second one model has it, it should be the status quo. My only other qualm with it has to be the fact that the motion sensing capabilities feel somewhat unresponsive and tacked on. It seems like something added as an afterthought to appeal to Wii gamers. out of all the games I tried with motion sense capability, none of them seemed to feel like it worked like it should.

However, that’s the only 2 gripes I can think of. it’s a solid phone with a solid slider design. I love the shiny look, and I love the rubber grips on the back for when you’re holding it in gaming mode. It needs more games that’ll take advantage of the extra gaming buttons that are included, but as long as the phone takes flight, that’ll come in time (I’m looking at you, digital chocolate). Oh yeah, and I LOVED the games that have you hold it sideways to play, you get a better screen layout that way, more like a TV.

I also had a problem with some incoming text messages, which I think I’m going to chalk it up to being a pre-production unit. I was told later that I Should have received some SMS messages sent via yahoo, but their messenger was being told my phone was unable to receive SMS messages.

I would say this is a phone to be worth getting if you don’t have a phone already and you want something that can handle some games with innovative features, but if you already have a phone, don’t throw it away for this one.

Now just to wait for the rumoured PSP phone, which from what I hear, sony is going alone on this one, without Ericsson. what a shame…

Nothing terribly interesting

ok so here I am, jenny is out drinking…somewhere… she texted me to let me know she was going to be later than she thought, but didn’t answer when I texted her back asking where she was… do I have a right to be a little paranoid? it’s something I can’t help. I’ve been burned pretty bad in the past, and adding alcohol into pretty much any mix never seems like a wise choice to me…

So I left work early today. I wasn’t feeling well, I haven’t all day. I woke up at 9am and I could not breathe. like at all. that went on for 2 hours, and if it had kept going on I would have ended up at the hospital. so because of that I’ve been a little weak and shaky all day, add into that the fact that we were busy as all fuck the whole time I was there and the fact my lungs were burning all day, which means I was talking with them all day, and it’s a bad mix. I don’t think that they really believed I wasn’t feeling well, but they can lick my balls, as aubree would say (she’s an uncouth one isn’t she? )

They FINALLY came and disconnected the cable today. It’s not a big deal, I wanted it gone and we were hardly using it anyways… all the shows we want to watch can easily be seen on the internet, which is fine by me.

I’m bored. Really bored. I have no one to talk to and you can only play rock band on your own for so long before it gets a little tiring. I played 5 songs and I was done. It kinda sucks not really having any friends. I have work friends, but they’re work friends, and I don’t often mix that with home life. There has to be something fairly worthwhile that I know of outside of work for me to want to do that. I’m not being emo when I say I don’t really have any friends, it really is true. just look at my phone to prove that, there’s almost no numbers in it, and most of those are family, I think. Which is probably also why I think there’s maybe one person who checks this blog regularly (hi aubree!) and I know jenny checks it too, but I don’t think as often (hi jenny!)

i’m gonna bitch about work some more, I think…. I just really wish I could find something I could do that I could at least semi-enjoy… something with some real responsibility. They try to tell you when working at a call center that you’re working independently, and blah blah blah, but you’re really not. it’s like high school. they even make you start by sitting in a classroom for weeks on end. and then they have you do tests. like constantly. and who ever heard of a real job where you get a review 4 TIMES A MONTH or more, in some cases? last night we ended our night off the phones being lectured for an hour about how we’re not doing this right, or we’re not doing that right. and everything they said I was doing right. this isn’t rocket science. it’s not even grade 9 english. it’s regurgitating information that comes up in front of you on the screen. it’s working with underachievers who have no interest in doing their job properly, let alone to the best of their abilities. I may have dropped out of college (3 times!) but fuck. I’m better than this. I deserve better. I deserve some type of job where I can use my mind once in a while. I feel like I’ve been just stagnant the last 7 or 8 years, professionally speaking. I really wish I could go back to school, but I don’t have the money or the means to get the money. I can’t afford the several grand a year (it’s about 3 grand or so a year to attend college, last I checked), nor do I have any idea what I want to do. I’m 28 years old and I don’t know what I want to do with my life. I’m too old to be working these shit jobs, and I’m too old to still be figuring things out. I wish someone could help me with these things, but there isn’t anybody.

wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which one fills up first, I guess…

anyways, that’s enough bringing myself down for one night.

randomness

ok, so I don’t have much to say today, been keeping fairly inactive this weekend

I’m on to book 5 in the chronicles of narnia. yes they’re childrens novels, and yes they’re only about 200 pages apiece, but the fact that I’ve read 4 books in the past week or so is something I proud of. I think it actually helps that they’re shorter. I’m a little ADD when it comes to reading. when I’m reading longer books I tend to obsessively read them until I’m about halfway through and then I just lose interesting.

Did you ever think of me? oh so considerate…

yeah, I’m listening to foo fighters, what of it?

So censorship is something I’m not a fan of. At all. which is why I like being Canadian, as we’re not big on the whole censorship thing. Like take the Rock Band games for instance, every single f-bomb in the game has been blanked out, even when it sacrifices the flow of the song, which it almost always does, however a song like “Spoonman” by Soundgarden (it was Soundgarden, right?) which is unforgivingly about heroin is fine. it’s not even like “heroin is bad” it’s just… about heroin. “all my friends are brown and red” is fine, but “I’ve got this fuckin thorn in my side” isn’t? what the hell. someone’s priorities are way out of wack.

So for now I don’t have to worry about Aubree any more. yay for that

I’m looking forward to my next scheduled day off with jenny. maybe we’ll go see a movie or something. if there’s anything good playing… if you have any suggestions of something we’d both enjoy let me know (even though I know Aubree is pretty much the only one reading this lol I know jenny has looked at it a couple of times too..)

Alright. that’s all for now, I have to run to the store.

friday at last

so i’m just writing a quick post because I haven’t in a while… I’m getting ready for work and it’s friday, my second last friday that’ll actually be a friday until… well… I don’t know when, pretty much forever unless I can find a real job.

I’m a little worried about Aubree right now. I won’t go into details because the only people who are probably reading this know the situation, but I just hope things improve for her or don’t get too bad.

ok… so on the plus side of my fridays no longer being fridays (they’ll be sundays for me soon) is that I’ll get to have a common day off with jenny. which makes me happy, because we have not had a common day off in some time. I really wish my new shift was at least a couple of hours earlier though

anyways, gotta run

I did get the tattoo after all

so Here it is … only a few minutes old, but I’m not going to post any more right now

flip flopping

so it’s been a couple of days since I’ve actually posted anything besides pictures or videos, and I have nothing else to do today so I figured I may as well post.

I’ve been feeling really sad today and for the life of me I can’t figure out why. Aubree managed to cheer me up somewhat when we were chatting earlier, but I’m still in this funk. It’s way deep down inside and it feels like the slightest thing could set me off. I’ll get over it, but I really hate feeling like this.

So I finally decided, I am not going to get tattooed right now. Maybe at some point in my life, but not right now. If I don’t have anything I feel that strongly about, or something that meaningful, why would I get it permanently etched on my body? Jenny is pressuring me to get it done, and that’s really hurting me. The one person I thought would never try to pressure me into doing something is doing just that.

Fuck. I can’t write any more right now.

Piercings and Tats

Eyebrow piercing

Jenny’s lamb

so jenny and I got body mod done last night. I got pierced and she got inked. Now she wants me to get inked, but I don’t know about that…

Finally managed to vlog something

ok so I finally managed to work out the snags of getting the camera to work, so here’s the first video entry, hopefully there’ll be more but I don’t want to do one unless I have something to say…

So it looks like I’m going to get a piercing tonight, but suddenly I don’t know if I want to… it almost feels like I’m chickening out, but I already had one done… am I too old to be doing something like this? I dunno… but if I don’t go get money/bus tickets soon, it won’t happen tonight at least… so I’ll keep this short and I’ll try to post a picture of it when I get back.